While I’ve always experienced the dawn of spring as a time of great joy, this month was largely one of grief, as my younger brother very recently passed away in a car accident. I hesitated as to whether to share this here but ultimately decided to do so, because I’ve been surprised to discover how little we collectively talk about the experience of grief, despite it being the most human of things. But I’ve found connection to be healing, and maybe it’s not a coincidence that this is unfolding during the onset of spring. The early days of this season are marked by the unsteady and fledgling transition between the cold of winter to the takeover of buds and blooms, and in many ways this is the perfect metaphor for life. Ups and downs, highs and lows. And despite the sadness of the moment, hope springs eternal. For me this month, that was in gazing at orchids, flying kites, enjoying longer days and embarking on some big life transitions. Here's a little glimpse…
10 Things to Check Out
As a society, I’m so glad that we’re coming around to understanding the critical importance of mental health. Off and on through the last years, and especially in this season of grief, I have turned to therapy as a crucial part of my mental health toolbox. Sadly, it’s not cheap or accessible to all, but I think that the world of online therapy is a huge step forward in addressing those gaps. I personally love Better Help (where you can search for therapists by gender, ethnicity, training/discipline, specialty, etc.), but I really appreciated this broader round-up of some of the best online therapy sites, by the lovely newsletter The Good Trade.
One of my absolute treasures in DC is the Tregaron Conservancy. About a 20-minute walk from my house and on the rear grounds of the Washington International School, Tregaron is a true urban oasis – a bundle of trails and meadows, anchored by a lily pond – run by a nonprofit that aims to “preserve, rehabilitate and maintain…the historic landscape [of the Tregaron Estate] for the benefit and enjoyment of the public”. As part of this endeavor, they aim for sustainable landscape renewal, cultivating a healthy habitat for plants and wildlife and accompanying visitors on a journey of education and ecological awareness. Over the years, my son Rohan and I have hunted for Easter eggs, planted trees and taken regular refuge in Tregaron during the early Covid days. DC residents or visitors who love nature – check it out!
I’m so glad that fashion from the African continent is finally enjoying its much-deserved place in the spotlight. The continent has some of the most beautiful textiles, talented craftspeople and sophisticated techniques of printmaking, unknown in much of the world. Recognizing this, my former colleague Morgan launched Geometric, which works with artisans in Ghana under an ethos of “elevating the human experience in the supply chain”. Check out their lovely collection of jewelry, bags and apparel! I love this indigo fabric, which I’ve used as a table runner, draped across my bed and now layering on to my headboard.
For anyone who is experiencing or seeking to understand more about the complex emotion of grief, I can’t say enough good things about Anderson Cooper’s podcast ‘All There Is’, during which he talks about the death of his father when we was a child, his brother’s suicide and the much later passing of his mother Gloria Vanderbilt. He does so in the context of conversations with a range of people (Stephen Colbert, Elizabeth Alexander, etc.), all of whom have had their own experiences and insights. It’s thoughtful, real, raw and – for me at least – has been hugely helpful.
While I went soon after it first opened a couple of years ago, this month I made a return visit to Planet Word, a museum here in DC dedicated solely to, well, words! Built on the grounds of the old Franklin School, this small but mighty museum is devoted to the beauty of etymology and phonetics and explores how words are created and used in literature, music, comedy, advertising and other realms. Admission is free with reserved or walk-up passes, though a $15 donation is recommended.
While I’ve never been to Trinidad & Tobago, I have a recent obsession with the cuisine! We’ve got a couple of splendid Trini eateries in DC proper, both helmed by Jeanine Prime, the street food spot Cane on H Street NE and its cool fine dining sibling St. James, on 14th Street. Being the amateur culinary anthropologist that I am, what’s most fascinating to me is the influence and use of Indian spices and techniques in Trinidadian cuisine, which is of course not surprising given the huge Indo-Trinidadian population, largely descendants of the indentured laborers who settled there in the second half of the 19th and early part of the 20th centuries.
You’ll have to excuse me for all the DC love in this installment, but there is truly nothing like Washington in the spring! The highlight is of course the cherry blossoms, which were a gift from the Japanese to the American people back in 1912. Known in Japanese as sakura, the bloom of the flowering cherry trees is an annual highlight in the nation’s capital. This year, Peak Bloom was during March 22-25, and we braved the crowds in both venturing to the Tidal Basin area (aka ground zero) as well as the annual Kite Festival that is part of the cherry blossom festivities. For a few more days, you can view the blooms from anywhere in the world thanks to the Bloom Cam!
During the aforementioned kite festival, we took a picnic inspired by Nowruz, the Persian new year. Coinciding with the spring equinox, Nowruz is celebrated in countries throughout the Middle East and Central Asia. In the Zoroastrian tradition, it signifies the return of a spirit which had been slumbering underground during the cold of winter, and in the Persian culture it’s marked by good times with family, feasting, spring cleaning and jumping over fire (which symbolizes burning away negativity from the past year). While I have no connection to Nowruz beyond some Persian friends, I appreciate what this holiday represents and always like to give a nod to it. This year, it seems all the more meaningful given the ongoing revolution and uprising in favor of women’s rights in Iran. For anyone who wants to know more about the situation, The Guardian’s piece on women forced out of Iran is a must-read.
Last week marked the beginning of Ramadan. While I have lived or worked in majority Muslim countries in the past, I found this this helpful (and beautiful) guide to Ramadan for non-Muslims to be really well-done. It’s a great primer as to how we can be supportive friends or colleagues to our Muslim sisters and brothers during this time of restraint, faith and fellowship.
This month, the Spring Equinox coincided with the new moon in Aries. I read somewhere that this new moon energy in concert with new astrological year can be considered as a fresh start for us all. I like that idea, and I also really liked this short essay about what we carry from winter to spring, by Kayti Christian. As she writes: “We, too, experience winter as a season of metamorphosis in preparation for spring. Sometimes the metamorphosis is grand and obvious, like the butterfly bursting from its cocoon; other times, the growth is subtle. It can look like tiny posture shifts and we may not even recognize the transformation we’re undergoing. Even still—the rest we’ve taken and the hardships we’ve endured throughout winter have changed us for the better. Spring reveals this. Winter was never the end; rather, it was always leading us here, to this moment and place, to the spring equinox and the first day of a new season. How we arrive is just as important as the arrival itself.”
What I Read
This month, I didn’t much feel like being out and about. But this meant that I did get in a fair bit of reading, and I particularly enjoyed Behold the Dreamers by Imbolo Mbue. It’s the story of a Cameroonian immigrant family chasing the American dream in Harlem, during the times leading up to the financial collapse of 2008. I found the book to be evocative, universal and wise.
What I Watched
Is there anyone around who doesn’t miss Anthony Bourdain? The man was an iconoclast, and his curiosity, taste and humanity knew no bounds. I’ve surely watched every episode of “Parts Unknown,” and his book Kitchen Confidential is pretty damn amazing. So it’s probably no surprise that this month, I devoured ‘Roadrunner’, the new documentary on Bourdain that’s available on HBO Max. It’s tender, intimate, tragic – all the things!
What I Listened To
According to Wikipedia, the Portuguese word saudade means the “emotional state of melancholic or profoundly nostalgic longing for a beloved yet absent something or someone.” Given events of late, maybe it’s not surprising that I’ve been listening to a lot of the beautiful Portuguese music that is surely the best vessel for this emotion – fado. Specifically, to the music of Gisela João, a beautiful, young, vivacious, hip fadista who I had the good fortune of meeting more than a decade ago in Lisbon, where I had the pleasure of watching her perform in a legendary fado venue downtown, after which she led us to an open-mic situation in an ancient-looking restaurant in the backstreets of the Alfama. It’s a beautiful memory, and Gisela’s music will transport you there and surely remind you of someone you loved and perhaps lost.
What I Cooked
So I mentioned the Nowruz-inspired spread for the picnic that we took to the Kite Festival. Well, the highlight of it was certainly this amazing spiced carrot, pistachio & almond cake with rosewater cream (recipe by Sabrina Ghayour wonderful cookbook Persiana). My mom has made me this wonderful treat for my birthday twice over the last few years when I was visiting her and my dad, and I finally made it myself. It’s completely gluten-free thanks to its almond meal base, and it’s got the lovely Persian flavors of pistachio and rosewater. Like any self-respecting Indian woman, I consider myself to be an authority on good carrot cake…and let me tell you that this one is bomb!
And a poem to sign off…
S IS FOR SPRING S is for spring. Season of soft and shift. Symphony of sorrow, southwestern sunset. Stars in syncopation, soul in shanthi. Solo sister, saudade for a son. Serendipity of Saturday, solitude of Sunday. Songs of salvation, sweetness of sakura. S for your smile, shining in the sacred somewhere. Serenity of stories, salutation for spring. - Ramya Vivekanandan, March 31, 2023
Thank you for reading and for being here! Please feel free to leave a comment, let me know what has inspired YOU this month or share this newsletter with anyone who you think would enjoy it. All my very best for the new year, and see you at the end of April!
Excellent newsletter. Deeply sorry about your brother; heartfelt sympathies to you and all the family. Thank you for the suggestion of a fado artist. That almond pistachio spice cake with rose cream sounds fantastic! Hug from Indiana!
Hi Ramya. I’m so sorry about your brother. Sending you best wishes thoughts prayers!